Steak & Blowjob Day

This is one of my favourite 'holidays'. A month after Valentine's, we have Steak & Blowjob day. It's a day to commemorate how many men go out of their way to make Valentine's Day special for their partners. Society has conditioned (or more accurately, guilt-tripped) straight men to believing that if their relationship - and more importantly, Valentine's Day - isn't romantic, it's their fault for being horrible boyfriends/husbands/partner. I'm not sure how this applies generally to gay relationships, so I won't speculate.

In Brunei (and in many other places too), I hear people saying that men only want women for sex, or that if you're a somewhat attractive woman, all your guy friends want to have sex with you. It implies that men only see women as sexual objects. This is not true at all. True, most men would have sex with an attractive woman given the chance, and given that there are no consequences. Many men would fantasise about getting it on with their female friends/colleagues/acquaintances. But this does not make us perverts.

Even with occasional images of you all naked, slathered in massage oil ready to perform a full body-on-body massage popping in our heads, we do genuinely consider you as our friends too. There's no dishonesty in our friendship with you. We did not become friends with you for the sole intention of hopefully one day having your lovely lips wrapped around our hard cocks, although that would be a neat bonus.

Of course, there are exceptions. There are assholes, jerks, and cock-for-brains. But don't let that dirty the name of the rest of the straight male population.

Oh, if you're a woman who has had an exceptionally great Valentine's Day, remember, men need a reminder that they are loved too. Treat them to a steak and blowjob this 14th March.